“For those of you just tuning in, or suffering from severe dementia, let’s recap as the Phillies change pitchers here in the bottom of the 9th in this World Series Game 6 here in the Bronx.

 

In the Home Depot Game Saving Moment, in the 6th inning, Chase Utley has gone deep into the notoriously short porch here at Yankee Stadium off Andy Pettitte, surpassing Reggie Jackson’s record for the most home runs in a post-season.  Home Depot, let’s build something together. 

 

As you have pointed out once or twice Tim, for the viewers who don’t know, the Yankees used that short porch to their advantage during the inaugural season here at the new stadium and also here tonight, as Robinson Cano led off this 9th inning with a solo shot of a hanging Pedro Martinez curve to bring the Yankees within 1 run.  The Yankee faithful have been chanting “Who’s Your Daddy?” for the last 2 hours and 50 minutes, which, for those of you who may not know, is a reference to the comments made by Martinez during the 2004 season.  Pedro responded as he left the field after giving up the 4-bagger to Cano by pulling down his pants and taking a dump in front of the visitors’ dugout and then flinging his feces into the luxury seats.

 

The score is now 5-4 Phillies.  Derek Jeter stands at 2nd base after launching a long fly ball over the head of the rapidly aging Raul Ibanez.  The fiery centerfielder Shane Victorino, who, as some of you may know, is from Hawaii, is again furious in the dugout after having been removed between innings, and has bludgeoned Charlie Manuel with his fist.  You may recall that Victorino was hit on the very same hand by a pitch during Game 5 on Monday night, but an X-ray procedure was were done using the X-ray machine in Citizens Bank Park and the team doctors looked at X-ray images to determine that the X-ray results were negative.  Manuel appears to be semi-conscious on the floor of the dugout with our headphones somewhat askew.  We will be bringing you audio of Pitching Coach Rich Dubee answering our questions soon.  But first let’s go to our intrepid reporter, Ken Rosenthal.  Ken?”

 

“Yes, Joe, that is correct. Now back to you.”

 

“Thank you, Ken.  So, again, for those of you just tuning in or having retrograde 5th degree amnesia, let’s recap.  Chan Ho Park appears warmed up and ready to go. There’s 1 out after Johnny Damon popped out to former New York City Mayor Rudolph Giuliani.  Mark Teixeira digs in at the plate.  Teixeira, as some of you may know, was acquired by the Yankees during the off-season, along with Pitchers C.C. Sabathia and A.J. Burnett.  And who is looming large in the on-deck circle? None other than Alex Rodriguez.  For those of you don’t know, Rodriguez has redeemed himself in this postseason, after going 1 for 793 in the playoffs before this year.

 

The Yankee Captain, Derek Jeter, stands on 2nd base representing the tying run.  You know Tim, I don’t think I’ve mentioned this before, but Jeter and Phillies 2nd baseman Jimmy Rollins spent a great deal of time together last spring as teammates during the World Baseball Classic.  I don’t know if any of you have noticed this, but throughout this Series, whenever the two of them have gotten within 600 feet of each other, they’ve been sharing a smile.  Here’s some footage of that now:

[15 minute video of Jeter and Rollins doing calisthenics together, playing catch, getting massages and pedicures, laughing over cosmos, etc.]